Jeb Bush Covers ZZ Top on His US Ed Reform Rock Tour Show in Mississippi


ZZ Top’s tribute to Mississippi blues icon Howlin’ Wolf, My Heads in Mississippi opens thus:

I’m shufflin’ thru the Texas sand,

But my head’s in Mississippi.

I’m shufflin’ thru the Texas sand,

But my head’s in Mississippi.

The blues has got a hold of me.

I believe I’m gettin’ dizzy. (Spoken: Help me now.)

Who can blame another rock legend, Jeb Bush, he of the education reform rock genre, had these timeless lyrics on his mind during his, um, concert yesterday in the Mississippi capital. No wonder the blues have hit Bush. He’ll  have to stick his head in the sand the  next time he goes back to Texas where his brand of ed reform rock  is collapsing faster than the beat to You Got Me Under Pressure. Small wonder Bush is a bit dizzy. For some reason, Bush never includes this song in his cover schtick of  “that little ol’ band from Texas.”

But unlike ZZ Top, who still gets it done with their old classics, Bush’s old no excuses standards don’t seem to get er’ done anymore (Apologies to Larry the Cable Guy). But after the opening act from a clearly looking to curry favor Mississippi Governor Phil Bryant, Bush gave it the  tired, old  but high-stakes tested try. Among favs which still play well during Florida Chamber of Commerce breakfast karaoke, the Mississippi press corp were treated to:

“La Choice”

“Watin’ for the Common Core Standards Bus”

Jeb Just Left for Chicago”

“Fool for Your Charter Schools”

“Sharp Dressed Tax Credit”

“Tube Snake Accountability”

“Viva Las Voucher”

A sweaty like Elvis, towel-draped Bush briefly spoke with reporters after the show and talked about his now status quo career.

The world will come to an end,” Bush said if every governor doesn’t buy into his seductive  Fool for You Charter Schools. It actually gets a whole lot better when you have La Choice. The one time teen idol,  now heads the Foundation Viva Las Vouchers, said it’s important to keep Waitin’ for the Common Core Standards Bus.” 

A starry-eyed Bryant sighed as Bush left the building. Jeb Just Left for Chicago on a private jet owned by some rich British moguls named Pearson.

About Bob Sikes

A long time ago and a planet far, far away I was an athletic trainer for the New York Mets. I was blessed to be part of the now legendary 1986 World Series Championship. My late father told me that I'd one day be thankful I had that degree in teaching from Florida State University. He was right and I became twice blesses to become a teacher in the late 1990's. After dabbling with writing about the Mets and then politics, I settled on education.
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